75% of all Americans are sick and tired of hearing about steroids.
69% think that the constant coverage of star athletes and their alleged problems suck all the fun out of sports.
91% could care less whether Bonds breaks the home run record so long as the media stops harping on it and reminding everyone that he is the all time worst human being ever because he allegedly took steroids and that makes him a cheat and a liar and someone ought to send in the army and remove him from power (WMD's or no!).
5% of all Americans are stuck watching teams like the Devil Rays.
51% of all Americans elected George W. Bush despite evidence that he was a really lousy President.
85% believe that we ought to have a real commissioner.
100% of all real San Franciscan's hate the Dodgers.
115% of all real Bostonians hate the Yankees (some dead were reanimated for this poll).
99% of all Cubs fans agree that their team has no chance, but hope otherwise.
83% of all Braves fans are convinced that their team in the playoffs is a natural occurrance like rain falling.
21% of "fans" get their opinions on sports topics from polls like this one.
69% of NASCAR fans would rather be watching baseball... the way it used to be played.
All poll findings were done "scientifically" in much the same way ESPN conducts their "scientific" polls.
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4 comments:
Ha...good stuff.
Those ESPN.com polls are a joke. Any volunteer "poll" is a joke.
And Bonds is clearly the worst person ever to walk this earth, because he happened to take some 'roids...like A WHOLE LOT OF OTHER BALLPLAYERS.
Stats are in. Number of people polled for "100% of all 'real' San Franciscan's hate the Dodgers" came out to 2!
That was a compliment, btw.
Here's another one you missed, Will:
99.9% of Americans think Barry Bonds really did take steroids and admitted to taking it after hearing Curt Schilling's radio interview with Mike & Mike in the morning.
As a sort of religious aside here, the only people reading this blog are Giants fans and Dodger fans... isn't that like the kid lying down with the lion?
I mean, I can completely understand it when the World Series Cardinals have decided to skip competing this season and the Yankees and Red Sox just ain't what they used to be, but still... you'd think there'd be more than just Giants and Dodger fans at the 7th Inning Stretch
So how about posting a "Wanted ad" here for more writers? Anyone game? I nominate Andy to do the honors....
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